Looking at Our World Through Poetry: Place of Resolution

Come, My Beloved,

Take my hand.
Let us walk, together,
On a voyage of exploration
Through this - our home.
Let us, within our house -
Within our sanctuary,
Engage, jointly,
In the creation of a sacred place -
A place of resolution
Of reconciliation
Of healing
Of re-connectedness.

Let this be a place

That exists in real time;
That has its coordinates
In measurable space;
Let it be a place
That our physical bodies
Can touch;
A place
That we can see with our eyes.
Thus, daily, we will be reminded,
With our physical senses,
Of our ‘intent to resolve’ differences
In peace.

Let us pledge
To come to this area -
To this sacred place
Within our home,
In the Spirit of Reconciliation.

Yes, My Dear One,
In the Spirit of Creation,
I take your extended hand.
I ask, too, that you take my hand,
As we, together,
Choose a physical space
Within our home -
A place where we resolve to commune,
Always,
In the Spirit of Peace.
I concur with your vision,
In trust
And with love.

But, let us ever remember
That this place
Exists, too,
In our hearts
Minds
And souls.
That, which we, today, create
With our physical bodies,
We can create, also,
With our minds.
No matter how far
From our home, we may travel,
Let us each carry, within us,
An image of our
‘Place of Reconciliation’.
Let this place be a symbol
Of our joined purpose.

Come, My Beloved,
Let us make of this space,
A place
Where we can bring our differences;
Our difficulties;
Any seemingly
Irreconcilable issues
That may arise between us;
Our disappointments
With the world;
And, yes, even sometimes,
Our disappointments
With each other.

There will be conflict between us;
Such is inevitable.
We will disagree, at times,
For we are human.
But, we can resolve to discuss
To table our differences
To voice our individual opinions
To work towards solutions
At this - Our Place of Resolution.

Let us, together, move to this space
Whenever we feel
That we will argue in a way
That may negate the Spirit of our Love.
Let us hold aside our anger.
Rather, let us make use
Of certain of our business skills
To navigate
To understand
The emotional terrain
Of our relationship.

Let us never be afraid
To say, one to the other,
“I am vulnerable;
I hurt;
Please hold me;
Please hear me.

Let us, today,
Pledge that, that cry,
From the depths of our hearts,
Will never go unheard
By either of us.

Let us make written notes
Of the issues
Of the points
That we wish to discuss.
Thus, we can, more clearly
More objectively
More kindly
More logically,
Present our individual points of view.
In this way, we can more calmly
Present the perceptions,
Individual and unique,
That we each bring
To a given situation.
Let us vow,
“Never to forget the logical
In the possible
‘Illogical of any given moment’.”

Yes, My Dear One,
With Love, I agree.
My soul
My heart
My mind
Answer with a resounding, “yes”
To this method of further
Honoring and respecting
Our commitment,
Each to the other.
Let us resolve, too,
To also use this Place of Resolution
As a ‘Point of Remembrance’
Of all that is good and noble
Between us.

I Promise, always,
To look into my heart
Mind
And soul;
To engage in honest self-examination
Of my own thoughts
Motives
Deeds.
This self-examination,
I know, you too,
Will do.

Let us remember, always,
That our respective feelings
Are always true
Are always valid.
Let us remember
That we come, in honesty,
To our feelings
From the contextual
And perceptual frameworks
That we bring to this relationship -
To this, our marriage.

Let us remember
That our individual perceptions
May not, always, be based
Upon concrete reality;
That even though your perception
Of the moment
May differ radically from my perception,
That neither of us
Is, thereby,
Automatically, wrong or bad.
Let us remember
To always honor;
To ever vow to try to understand
The perceptions
And the feelings
Of the other.
May we, too,
Each, resolve to keep
Our minds open,
Ready to learn,
Each, from the other.

Let us resolve
To listen;
To honor;
To make adaptations
Based on the situation;
Based on the reality of the world
Within our home;
And on the reality
Within the greater world we inhabit.

And, My Beloved,
Let us remember, always,
Our great love,
Each, for the other.
When we are tempted to argue,
To fight with unreason,
To disagree, with anger,
Let us recall
That we often treat our co-workers
And our friends,
With courtesy,
Even in the midst
Of widely differing viewpoints.

Although we deeply love
Each, the other,
We may, at times,
Be tempted to take
That love for granted.

Let us use the presence
Of our “Place of Resolution”
As a concrete reminder;
As a visible shrine
To remind us, ever,
To treat each other
With even greater respect
With even greater courtesy
With even greater empathy
Than that with which we treat those
In the world
External to our home.

My Dear One,
I know you in a more profound;
In a more intimate way
Than does any other living soul.
And, you,
You know me, in this way, too.

Sometimes,
When we are hurt
By the onslaughts of life;
When we are frazzled;
When we are torn asunder
By our individual pain,
We may well be tempted
To use illogic
To be cruel
To take out,
One, on the other,
The hurt that bedevils us.

Let us remember, always,
That the insults
We might be tempted to use,
One, to the other,
Are soul-threatening arrows -
Arrows more pointed;
More barbed;
Their tips
Imbued with that special poison
That flows
From our greater knowledge
Of each other.

If we are thus tempted,
Let us resolve, always,
To go apart a while;
To seek a place
Of individual solace,
Until we can
Ponder how very deeply;
How very unfairly,
We each could wound the other.

Yes, My Beloved,
I have shared with you,
My most intimate woundings;
My most secret embarrassments;
My darkest, deepest fears;
I have shown you wounds
That I have never shown another.

Not even my own parents
Know me, as you do.
I agree with you
That we have revealed much,
Each of us,
To the other,
In the spirit of deep intimacy
Of true sharing
Of sacred trust.

May we resolve, never, ever,
To betray that most sacred trust -
That trust we have deposited,
Each, in the other.

And, My Dear One,
Throughout all our days, together,
Let us
Resolve to continue
In that constancy of shared trust.
Let us resolve, never, ever,
To betray the other,
Not even in the sanctity
Of our own home,
For this should be
The safest refuge -
The most sacred place of all.

If we ever feel tempted,
To trample that safety
To besmirch that sanctity,
Let us resolve
To step aside;
To think with empathy;
To step inside the mind and heart
Of the other;
To feel the pain
That our words would bring.
And then,
In trust,
Let us walk, hand in hand,
To the “Place of Resolution”
Of Reconciliation
Of Reconnectedness.

Betty R. Stockley
Copyright 2001